Dropping of a piece of my heart…
Sunday evening we moved my middle son into college. He is the first one to move away “properly”
and first one to pursue an education after High School with a career in
mind. So proud of him on many levels,
but – I didn’t anticipate my heart ache quite so much. We have had a LOT of loss to say the least
this past year, decade, whatever…
So, watching my grown up son move off – hit home in the
heart zone. While he isn’t terribly far
– he isn’t right down the stairs, I can’t holler to get up, get a morning or
evening hug as often either. This is his
time – his new path and journey and I’m so glad he has chosen the college he
did and the path he is on. He’s had his
share of challenges, but when he wants something – he works so hard for
it. He’ll have some tough days and weeks
ahead – he knows I’m only a phone call away.
I’m trusting God with this “child” who is a young man, that He will
watch over him and keep him safe.
I’m hoping as the laundry piles up, that he might feel the
urge to come home….that once in awhile he’ll miss his old folks called Mom
& Dad. But I’m also hoping he’ll
embrace his new community with joy and vigor – making the best memories of
college and making the best of friends as well.
How quickly we’ve gone from 4 to 2. Grief with acceptance still overwhelms us on
our daughter who has run off and doesn’t want anything to do with us. However, we rise again – God has gently poked
at our hearts to re-license for foster care.
I’m saying “Whoa God, we need a break – like a big one.” But the nagging is there as He gently prods
us. We are looking into the classes
we’ll have to take because of the years between our license – I think they
could actually be healthy for us to re-take as a way to reconcile our foster to
adopt journey – especially these rough waters we’ve been navigating. So….who knows what or who the future will
bring. We are God’s tools – being open
to him gives us peace and comfort as we trust His will for us – because,
really, He is in control….not us.
Putty in his hands….we surrender all.
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